


Heart of a Marine

by CoNic33



Category: The Resident (TV 2018)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:14:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26196970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CoNic33/pseuds/CoNic33
Summary: Ok because of this chapter I’m changing my rating to explicit due to sexual content. There is reference to domestic violence in Nic’s past but nothing graphic. As always love Kudos and Comments.On a different note I LOVED the new episode! The flashback to COVID-19 moments felt very real and left me in tears more than once. The wedding was perfect! I’m super excited to watch the rest of the story lines as the season continues.
Relationships: Conrad Hawkins/Nicolette Nevin
Comments: 26
Kudos: 50





	1. First Dance

**Author's Note:**

> I am almost done with chapter 2. I will probably post it in a few days. Let me know what you think. I went with a mature setting because the material will move to mature topics and scenes. However, the first chapter is not a mature rating itself. The first chapter is about establishing Conrad and Nic connection. It is just meant as a meet-cute.

The dance floor was packed with people moving to upbeat music. Nic Nevins was enjoying a fun evening with her friends. It has been a while since she let herself spend a night out. Her dear friend Mina had finally convinced her it was time for a break. It had been a stress-filled week between starting clinicals and two tests. Nic was determined to balance her time. She took her classes seriously and she was determined to do well. Tonight, she was going to forget all about those responsibilities.

Conrad had been running late. He hadn’t had a night off in weeks, so he jumped at the chance to meet up with Devon, Irving, and AJ. His eyes strained to look around the room trying to locate faces he recognized. As he scanned the room a stunningly beautiful woman came into his view. He stopped moving, soaking in the view of this beautiful woman. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder making him glance in the direction. 

“You made it!” Devon practically yelled in order to be heard over the music.

“Yeah sorry I am late,” Conrad responded as he looked back in the direction of the woman but had lost track of her. 

“No worries! We are over there.” He pointed past the dance floor to a back area of the club, “AJ’s girl brought some of her friends with her tonight. I am heading to the bar to grab some drinks.” 

“I need a drink so I’ll follow you.”

While they were waiting Conrad looked back hoping to catch a glimpse of the girl. Unfortunately, the dance floor was very crowded making it impossible for him to find her. He and Devon grabbed the drinks and headed to their table. On the way there Conrad couldn’t stop looking for her. He knew it was ridiculous but something about her caught his attention. 

Towards the back of the club, there were different size booths lining the wall. They moved towards a larger corner booth. Devon made it to the table sitting down the drinks while announcing to the group he had found Conrad. Conrad nodded to the guys. Turning towards Mina he gave her a warm smile as he continued looking around the rest of the table. He froze when his eyes landed on the last person. 

Devon introduced the three new girls, “These lovely ladies would be Jessica, Nadine, and Nicolette better known as Nic.” 

The girls gave Conrad a smile then returned to their previous conversation. Devon slid into a seat leaving the only open spot next to Nic. Conrad finally moved to sit next to her trying quickly to gather his thoughts. This was the girl he saw on the dance floor earlier. Now that he was sitting next to her, he was trying to keep his wits about him. Thankfully her attention was on the other girls and not him.

When the song changed all the girls started laughing “Ladies that is our song! Let’s go!” 

Conrad moved out of the booth allowing the girls out. He couldn’t take his eyes off of Nic as she went off with the girls. When he turned back to the table 3 sets of eyes watched him intently. 

“Yes?” He said knowing full well what their looks were referring too. 

AJ was the first to say something, “Look there our boy has it bad. I wonder which of our lovely lady friends has his fancy.”

Devon chimed in, “Well I think we can cross Mina off the list.” 

“No, I don’t think so,” making AJ laugh since it had not even crossed his mind as a possibility. 

“I’m thinking it is Nic. He seemed to change once he saw her,” Irving gave his assessment with a decent amount of certainty, while secretly hoping no one realized his own eyes were set on Jessica.

Devon’s eyes lit up, “Was she the girl you were staring at when you came in? You should have seen him. He didn’t even notice me. I’m willing to bet it was her.”

AJ was surprised, “He didn’t even notice you! Wow you know he has it bad. Our military man doesn’t lose track of his surroundings easily.”

Conrad stood stoically, “As much fun as CSI Relationship has been, I'm going to the restroom. Obviously, you don’t need me here for the conversation.”

The guys laughed as he walked away. All of them agreed it must be Nic. Conrad was always so sure of himself. If he wanted a girl he went for it. If she didn’t want him he simply moved on to the next willing partner. Yet when he sat next to Nic, they all realized he became quiet and unsure of himself. They came up with a plan to push their dear friend to make a move. 

AJ went over to the DJ and asked him to play a few slow songs in a row on his signal. He was enjoying the rare sight of watching Conrad squirm. When he saw the girls heading back to the table the plan was in place. The guys quickly paired up with the girls reassuring Nic that Conrad would be right back. When AJ saw Conrad heading towards the table he signaled the DJ. 

Nic gave a slight glare to Mina who simply smiled and shrugged. Knowing full well what the guys had planned. Sliding into the booth she waited for everyone to return. 

Conrad had almost made it to the table before he realized Nic was the only one sitting there. He forced himself to keep moving. As he approached she smiled at him but didn’t hold his gaze. He didn’t know what it was about her that both drew him in and made him want to run, “Where did everyone go?”

“They all decided to dance. I told them I would watch the table,” she glanced up at him. 

Conrad reached for his glass finishing off the whiskey. “The table won’t go anywhere. Let’s go join them,” holding his hand out to her. 

“No, it is fine,” she knew he was offering out of obligation. 

He motioned for her to take his hand while giving her a dashing smile. She met his eyes seeing a determined look she caved and took his hand. 

Taking her hand he led her onto the dance floor. He kept a very formal stance putting his hand about mid-back. Their hands clasped out to the side held just under shoulder height. Her arm rested on his shoulder blade. The dance was slightly stiff as their arms acted more like barriers holding them apart. 

Nic took in Conrad for a moment. He was handsome. He even had the ability to turn on some charm but there was something else there. Something she couldn’t formulate yet. So she decided to break the ice, “Do you go to school here?”

Her question pulled him out of his own train of thoughts, “Yes. I have been doing online this past semester. I wasn’t able to be on campus much.”

“Why?”

“I was finishing up some things.” He hesitated for a moment, “I’m in the military. I am a Corpsman.”

She had great respect for military personnel, “Oh so you are in the Navy.”

He grinned at her knowledge of the military, “I was. But I was attached to a Marine unit. I worked to earn my Fleet Marine. Becoming a Marine is one of my proudest achievements. I would have started there but they are limited in medical jobs.” 

She could tell it meant a lot to him, “Why did you want to be a Marine?” 

“They are the best,” he said with a wide grin on his face. 

“Well, I do have a heart for Marines,” matching his grin. 

“Good to know,” thinking of the tattoo covering his own heart. 

He decided to spin her out. When she came back in he held her closer. By relaxing his stance he removed the barrier that had been keeping them apart. 

At first, Nic tensed. She wasn’t sure if he had meant to move them closer. When she looked into his eyes they were soft making her relax into him. Trying to not overthink things she moved the conversation along, “What are you studying for?” 

“Doctor. You?”

“Nurse Practitioner.”

“Why not a doctor?”

“Nurses get to spend more time with their patients. I think in our current system people are rushed through.” Her voice dropped to almost a whisper, “It allows too much room for medical error.” 

He studied her for a moment. It was obvious to him there was something else behind the statement, “You have had personal experience with this.”

“Yes. My mother.”

“I’m sorry,” seemingly lost in thought as she didn’t say anything. Conrad never spoke about his mother but he felt she would understand, “I lost my mom while I was overseas.”

“I’m so sorry,” Nic could see the pain. “No matter how much time has passed the pain is still there. Just below the surface.” 

He gave a slight nod. 

Nic leaned further into him. She wanted comfort and he needed it. She tentatively raised her hand from his shoulder to the back of his neck gently rubbing it. In response, he moved his hand further down her back taking great pleasure when her eyes involuntarily closed. Slowly he moved their hands placing hers on his chest. He leaned a little further in till their faces were sided by side. They swayed like that until the music changed. Nic pulled back enough to look into his eyes. For a moment they just looked into each other's eyes. 

They slowly let each other go, turning to walk back to the booth. Taking their seats with the rest of the group. The group's conversation quickly picked up. However, Conrad could not stop thinking about what it felt like to have her hand in his. He was so lost in his thoughts of the past few moments he didn’t hear the question asked to him. 

“Conrad?” Mina said slightly louder than before. 

“I’m sorry Mina. I couldn’t hear your question with the music.” 

She gave him a knowing smile. She hadn’t been him a lot but she liked him. More than that she liked the idea of him and Nic, “I asked if you were going to be staying with us for a while? Or do we need to worry about you leaving us again for deployment?” 

Conrad chuckled a little at the pointed stare she gave after the question, “No, not anytime soon.” 

“You know that is not what I’m asking.”

Again Conrad chuckled, this face was even better, “I have not decided if I will take the opportunity or not.”

“What opportunity would that be?” Nic asked with curiosity. 

“I have been offered to bridge into the officers training. But I would have to commit to 6 more years. They would pay for my schooling which is a nice perk. I have a few weeks to make the decision.” Conrad suddenly became nervous again. 

“Well let’s enjoy our time with you while we have it,” Mina said with a smile. 

The rest of the evening was joyful for the group. A wonderful break needed from the constant strain of classes and clinicals. 

The group said their goodbyes. Conrad asked Nic where she was parked since she was at the back of the lot he had the opportunity he had been waiting for. Quietly he asked, “Do you mind if I walk you to your car?” 

Nic gave him a nod, “Thank you.”

As soon as they were out of earshot he said, “I enjoyed dancing with you tonight.”

A grin spread across her face, “So did I.” 

Conrad was trying to find the right words, “Would you…”

“I’m free tomorrow afternoon or evening. Let’s keep it casual. No white table cloths,” she grinned at him. 

Conrad returned the smile, “Ok. I will be at your place around 7?”

“That works. Goodnight Conrad. Thank you for the dance”

“Goodnight Nic.” 


	2. First Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This second chapter is a little bit of a slow burn. Nothing to mature here but the next chapter will probably have some mature scenes and topics. Hope you all enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Words in all Italics are the characters thoughts. I know this may not be grammatically correct but to me it helps as a reader.

The knock on the door came promptly at 5:00. Nic was nervous and excited. It had been a while since she was on a first date. She answered the door, “Hello you are right on time.”

Nic was dressed in black jeans with a blue top that brought the richness of her eyes. He loved her natural look, “Wow.”

She gave him a quizzical look, “What?”

“You are beautiful.” His eyes held such sincerity. 

Blush quickly covered her cheeks, “Thank you.”

Seeing her embarrassment made him smile. He sort of liked having such an effect on her, “Alright are you cool with walking about half mile? There is a tavern up a little ways that I thought would be fun. It’s just on the other side of the park.”

Nic was glad she had chosen casual shoes, “I don’t mind walking.” She turned and locked up the house, “Ok. Lead the way.”

They headed down the street. For a few minutes they were just quiet. Neither one sure where to start. Conrad decided to break the ice, “So how do you know Mina?” 

“We both worked at the same clinical site. It seemed like we kept crossing paths. We finally had lunch in the cafeteria one day. Pretty quickly we became friends. I know she has a rough exterior but once you get past take she is such a caring person.”

He chucked, “She really is. I only met her once or twice before my last deployment. But every month she sent me a package of stuff and a card from her and the guys. It meant a lot.” 

“I didn’t realize she knew you then.”

“Barely. Don’t tell anyone but she would sneak me a letter and I would write her back. That is how we got to know each other. It is also why I told AJ I would kill him if he hurt her.”

She couldn’t help the sweet smile that came to her face. AJ had become like a brother to her, “Oh AJ is a sweetheart. They are really good for one another.”

He reached for the door of the Tavern, holding it open for her. Smiling at her, “Yes they are.” After they walked in he moved them to one of the pool tables in the corner, “Do you play?”

Nic hid her smile, “A little.”

_ Perfect he thought to himself _ , “Well if you are up for it I’m happy to teach you.”

“Sounds like fun to me.” 

“Do you mind if I break?”

“Sure.”  _ The trap is set she smiled to herself.  _

She stood behind him as he leaned down to take the shot. The view was very nice, watching his muscles move under his shirt. There was no denying Conrad was an extremely attractive man. The sound of the cue ball cracking into the rack brought her out of her trance. The balls scattered across the table. A solid and a stripe both dropped into the pockets. He looked up at her, “Do you have a preference?”

She smiled at him, “Not at all.” 

“Okay,” he lined up his next shot. He sunk his first two but missed his third, “Alright your turn. Do you want me to help you?” 

The playful spark did not go unnoticed by her, “Yes, can you help me line it up? Is this how you place it in your hands?” Deliberately putting the pool through the wrong fingers. 

_ Oh yes this is going to be fun.  _ He sat his pool stick against the chair, “Close here let me help you.” He walked in front of her, gently he maneuvered her fingers to the correct position, “Now line up your stick and the cue ball up with the target.” Moving in closer, her scent filled him, quickly gathering his thoughts, “When you're ready, take your shot.”

She looked for the most difficult shot, “Ok I think I’m going to line up with the yellow one in the corner.”

“Whoa. Haha. Wait.” He moved behind her, “Let’s try for the red one. It is an easier first shot. Here I will help you.” He moved behind moving his body close to hers. 

She struggled to keep focused. His body formed around hers perfectly. Normally, anyone being this close to her would make her want to retreat but his touch, though never racking, was exciting. Taking a deep breath she focused on the shot. She shifted backwards slightly as she moved the stick causing her body to press further into his. He had already made sure their bodies were snug but her movement put just the right pressure on his crotch making him inhale sharply. This happened right as she was hitting the cue ball causing her aim to change. The cue ball went sailing down the wrong direction and barely touched another ball on the table. 

Conrad couldn’t help his chuckle, “No worries. You will do better next.”

She sent him quite the glare as he sunk the next two. Though the third shot missed it effectively prevented her from using that corner pocket. 

He smiled at her, “Alright, your turn. Do you want me to help you again.”

The smug look he gave her was the final straw. So she decided it was time to up her game, “Yes. Could you help me aim again?”

He gave a nod, “Happy too.” He was more than happy too. The feel of her body next to his was amazing. 

Waiting patiently she gave him a sweet smile. There was no denying that she was enjoying this game more than any before. As he wrapped around her she gave an almost purr like sound. It caused him to freeze making her silently giggle as she hit the cue ball sinking the first ball. She moved out of the embrace to gain a better angle sinking the second ball. Staying in the position of the shot she looked over at him. 

She had tricked him. The thought took a second to process, he wasn’t sure how to react. Then he saw her look over at him. All rational thoughts left disappeared. There was no way to describe how incredibly sexy she looked. He watched her intently as she moved to different positions hitting in one ball after another. Though he could hear the balls drop into the pockets his eyes never left her body. Watching her lean across the table almost made him lose control. 

“Corner Pocket,” she tapped the pocket with her stick. There was no hiding the smile forming on her lips. 

The sound of her calling the last shot brought him back to reality. She looked up at him. Her face beaming at the fact she had gotten to him. Secretly he didn’t care. The last 10 minutes had provided him with quite the show and he was more than a little turned on by it. Though it would add a fun element to the game he decided to not bring her attention to it. He tried to put a quasi serious expression on his face, “Wow. I feel used.” 

She scoffed at him, “Oh please.”

“You did.” He had to chuckle at her eye roll, “You used me to gain an advantage.”

She walked back to the head of the table where she had left him, “Well maybe just a little.”

Leaning into her he whispered, “Well you can use me anytime.” He pulled back and winked at her. 

Blush rose to her cheeks as she gave him a playful shove, “You can break.”

The next game took a little longer. He was down to one blue ball while she had just missed her shot at ending the game. After considering a different angle he settled him into position. Tapping the cue ball just right it stuck the blue sending it gently into the pocket. Grinning, he walked over to her, “Let’s make this game a little more exciting. The winner gets to pick the next date activity. Deal?”

“How do you know we are going on another date?” The question was playful to hide her surprise. 

“I just have a good feeling we are.” He gave her a grin, “So what do you say?”

She smiled back at him, “Deal.”

He turned back to the table. Lining up his shot, “8 ball side pocket.” 

Everything looked perfect when the 8 ball dropped. Unfortunately, it was followed by the cue ball. He leaned farther into the table and hung his head. Nic couldn’t help the little chuckle that escaped. She placed her hand on his shoulder rubbing it gently, “Oh poor Conrad. You lost twice. I think your pool game needs some help.”

His head shot up glaring at her which only caused her to giggle again, “Really. That’s how it is going to be.”

He stood up stepping closer to her holding her gaze. There was an intensity about him that was different from anyone else she knew. She enjoyed his closeness, “Yes it is. I think a movie date sounds like fun. Since I “used“ you I will let you pick the movie.”

He laughed lightly, “Thank you for the concession prize but I will take it. I guess we should go, it's getting late.”

They started making their way back to her place. Just a few feet outside of the tavern he took her hand in his. The rest of the way to her house they chatted about upcoming classes and life. Both had been quietly dreading the night ending, “Thank you for a really fun first date.”

He smiled at her, “You’re welcome. I had a lot of fun too. So what time do you want me to pick you up tomorrow.” 

“Wow. That was a great way of asking for a second date.” 

“Well I do believe that was part of the deal when I lost at pool. See it was really a win win. You get to pick the activity. I get to be with you.”

Trying to appear not phased she took a deep breath, “That is a good line.”

The blush that rose to her cheeks gave her away but he didn’t want her to doubt him. He slowly brought her into an embrace. He whispered, “Good line or not I mean it. I enjoy being with you.”

She leaned into his embrace, “I’m free tomorrow afternoon or evening.”

“I will see you at 3 tomorrow and I will have a movie picked out,” he winked at her. He leaned in to kiss her. At the last moment he moved to the side kissing her cheek. When he pulled back he noticed confusion on her face, “I don’t want to rush anything. I will see you tomorrow.”

“Ok, goodnight Conrad,” she gave him a sweet smile. 

It took all his self control not to kiss her, “Goodnight Nicolette.”

He watched her go in the house before he left. This was all new to him. The walk back to his place was long but helped him clear his head. 

Nic got ready for bed quickly. She curled up and tried to sleep. Her mind was filled with questions. Why did he not kiss her? He seemed to want too but what was holding back. There were so many questions. She couldn’t wait to meet Mina in the morning for coffee. 

“So how was your date?” Mina’s eyes were lit with joy. 

They pick up the drinks from the barista. Nic’s smile hadn’t faded all day, “It was fun.”

“Ummm you are not going to leave it at that. I need details.”

Nic giggle, “We went to the tavern just down from the house. We played pool-”

“You two played pool! The tavern will never let us go back.”

“What do you mean?” Giving Mina an innocent face. 

“That he is competitive and you are competitive.” 

Nic couldn’t help the grin that spread across her face, “Well it started out with acting like I didn’t know how to play.” She glanced up to see the shocked expression on Mina’s face, “Well he said he could help me so I baited him.”

“So you enjoy being in his arms,” it was her turn to grin. 

The blush rose quickly at the thought of being in his arms. There was no denying that they fit well together. Take a drink from her coffee, “It was a strategy to see how well he played.” 

“Right.That is why your face is turning red. So who won?” Laughing slightly at how her statement made her face turn even redder. 

“Me of course. In all seriousness I really had fun with him.” 

Finishing her drink off, “So how was the end of the date?”

Their conversation was interrupted by some girls they knew. Emma sat done next Nic, “Well hello ladies. I overhead Nic had a date. Who was the luck guy? Anyone we know?”

Mina was never a fan of these girls but knew they had to deal with each other in classes. For the sake of everyone she held her tongue on her true thoughts. She knew they would not leave without answers but she wished they would.

Nic tried to seem relaxed, “Umm, I went out with Conrad Hawkins.”

All the girls turned their attention to her. Emma was the first to speak, “Wow. I did see you as his type. I mean good for you. I know I sure had fun with him… for a time.”

Immediately Nic’s defense went up, “I am not sure what you are referring too.”

“I do not mean anything by it. Just that we all know him. He really enjoys having some fun.” This statement elicited laughter from the other girls, “He even has the perfect line to draw girls into bed.”

Nic was ignoring most of the conversation until her last sentence, “What do you mean?”

“Oh he tells you an intimate story. It draws you in with no problem. It works like magic. Haha he is definitely into a good time without worrying about commitments.” 

Mina was tired of the conversation, “Well thanks for stopping by Nic and I have a couple things we need to discuss for class. See you all around.”

“Oh no problem we were on our way out. Nice to see you Mina. Good luck Nic.” Emma left with a confident smile. 

After the girls left Nic avoided looking at Mina but had to ask, “Did you know this about him?” 

She took a deep breath, “I would never encourage you to go out with someone who I felt would hurt you. Please talk to Conrad about this.”

“That does not answer my question,” she gave a frustrated sigh. 

“You are going out again in a couple hours. Talk to him. He is a very honest person.”

“Fine,” she knew Mina was right. “At the end of the date he kissed me on the cheek,” she said quietly but loud enough for Mina to hear it. 

Mina gave her a big smile, “Good, now we need to study.”

After a few hours of studying for their respected classes they said their goodbyes. Nic promised to call her after she talked with Conrad. Once she was home her goal was to stay busy. It was a few hours before Conrad would arrive. 

Conrad knocked on the door around 3. He knew he was a little early but the excitement of seeing her was getting to him. 

Hearing the knock Nic forced herself to move. Taking a deep breath she opened the door… She didn’t want to have this conversation, “Hi.”

Conrad’s smile vanished when he noticed her demeanor, “Hi, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing… I don’t know… I just think we need to talk.” she put her hand to her head. She couldn’t figure out where to start. 

He tried to not panic, “Can I come in?”

“Yes, I’m sorry.” She hadn’t even realized they were still standing in the doorway. 

They moved inside the house. Quickly looking it over he determined he liked her decor. He took a deep breath, “Ok tell me what is going on.”

Before her nerves got the best of her, she decided to just go with it, “Conrad I don’t want to lead you on. I’m looking for a relationship and… I think… I don’t want one of us to get hurt. I’m not really into friends with benefits or one night stands. Not that I think it’s wrong just not my thing.” 

Conrad didn’t hear much of the mini ramble, he was too busy reading her. Her body language was tense and her tone was different… almost defensive. He genuinely wanted to figure out what was wrong. In a surprisingly calm voice he asked, “Where is this coming from? Did I do or say something wrong?” 

“No.” taking a deep breath she continued, “I was at coffee today with Mina. Some girls we know came by. They overheard me talking about our date. They asked who I went out with. When I told them… well one girl says she  _ knows _ you quite well.” Slightly rolling her eyes after the statement. 

For the first time his posture became defensive, “Who?” 

“I’m not looking to cause anyone trouble. I don’t want us to end up regretting anything.”

“Good neither do I. If you won’t tell me a name then tell me what was said about me. At least give me a chance to respond to it.”

“Conrad, I don’t want to upset you.” She didn’t want to hurt him or make him feel judged. 

His voice was controlled, “I’m a big boy, I can take it.”

“I was told you don’t have long term relationships but more like friends with benefits,” she geared his response but there was none. 

Conrad could tell she was holding back, “That is not all.”

She had such mixed feelings, “Let’s start there.”

“Fine. I know I have a reputation. Yes, I have been with quite a few women. No, I’m not usually looking for anything else.” He saw the pain flashover Nic’s face, the last thing he wanted to do was cause her pain. He took a step towards her, “Nic, I don’t know what I want here, but I know things are different with you.”

“I’m sure every girl wants to hear that too.” As soon as the words left her mouth she regretted it. 

He was about to take another step, but when she said that he stopped, “What do you mean?”

“Nothing.”

He couldn’t hide the hurt in his voice, “No, there was a reason.”

“One of the girls said you use an intimate story to draw girls in.” Her voice came out like a whisper. 

He didn’t say anything. The anger burned through him. Did she think so little of him, “Do you believe them? That I would tell you what I did just to get you in bed.”

She ran her hand through her hair, “I’m trying to figure this out. If I just believed them, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. I know girls can misread signals.” 

“There were no misread signals!” His frustration was clear. Taking a deep breath he tried to calm down, “I would never use that to get a girl in bed. If you don’t believe me go back and ask whoever for details. No one outside of the guys and Mine know that story.”

Nic was slightly taken aback by his frustration, “Conrad-“ 

“Look Nic,” he let out a deep breath to calm his nerves then took a step towards her, “I have never taken a girl home on the first date,” he closed the gap between them, “and kissed them on the cheek then left.” He smiled at her, “That is a first for me. You… You are not like any other girl.” He gently touched her face, “Trust me.”

Nic considered what he said for a moment. She gazed deeply into his pleading eyes, “I do.”

His face lit up causing his smile to crinkle his eyes. He moved even closer to her. “Good,” his lips kissed the corner of her mouth. He grinned at seeing her frown when he backed away, “In wanting to keep with that honesty we need to talk.”

“Ok,” she said, trying to focus back on the conversation. 

“I know I have a reputation. I don’t want you to be affected by that.”He looked at her for a moment then continued, “I kinda always have but it became… I became worse when I… after I… my-”

“Conrad I don’t care.” She touched his cheek, “It is ok. I want to know but I don’t want you to feel pressured at this moment to tell me. We have time.”

He gently covered her hand with his holding it in place. Keeping his eyes fixed on hers, he brought her hand to his mouth kissing her palm. Then he interlaced their fingers, “Come on. Let’s go see a movie.”


	3. First Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So here is chapter 3. I will have chapter 4 up quicker than normal. I needed a stopping point but that allowed me to already start the next chapter. I had a couple of questions about the age group. In my mind, they are somewhere between 25 to 30. I haven't thought a lot about those details but I did want to confirm they are not like 18 to 21. Thank you for the questions!!! Thank you for the great feedback as always I appreciate it!

Conrad pulled back into Nic’s driveway, “Well that movie was…”

“Awful.” Nic couldn’t help from laughing. 

He laughed along with her, “Well I guess you can pick next time.”

Nic stopped laughing but a lovely smile was on her face, “So you want to go out again?”

He returned her smile, “Yes. I enjoy spending time with you.”

“It’s not late. How about you come in? We can order pizza or something for dinner.”

“Absolutely.” 

Once the food had been ordered the both took a seat on the couch. Nic started the conversation, “So tell me more about yourself.”

Conrad sat his drink down, “Ok. Well, my parents divorced when I was young, probably 12. I loved my mother and hated my father. He was… is a difficult man. I was sent to military school when I was about 16 which is where I graduated from. After that, I joined the military.”

The whirlwind of information caught her off guard but she managed to keep up, “Why were you sent to military school?” 

He raised an eyebrow up at her, “Sure you want to know?” 

She couldn’t help the curiosity, “Yes.”

“I stole my dad’s car so I could run away with a girl. We were going to cross state lines to marry each other. However, my father caught us before we got too far. He told me I didn’t love the girl. So I punched him in the face. The next day he shipped me off to military school.”

“That’s heartbreaking. So she was your first love?”

He gave a slight laugh, “No, more like, first lust. She wouldn’t have sex with me unless we were married. So I said we should get married. She agreed. The icing on the cake was I would get to piss off my father.”

“Conrad!” She smacked his arm but was laughing at the story. 

He loved the way she looked when she laughed. He continued his story, “So I earned myself a one-way ticket to Military School. My father thought I would hate it but I ended up loving it. One of the science teachers gave me a love for medicine. She was a doctor who had served. That is what pushed me to join. The day I turned 18 I signed with the Navy. Hell-bent on being a medic and becoming a member of the Fleet Marine Force.”

“Oh yes, I remember, you wanted to be the best.” 

He gave her a somber smile, “Yes I did. I served with the finest men and women.” 

It was quiet for a moment both of them lost in thought. When she spoke her voice was hesitant, “Have you decided if you are going to sign the officer contract?”

He took a deep breath, “Not yet. I have a few more weeks to consider it.”

The weight of the answer hit her like a ton of bricks. She ran her hands through her hair, “Conrad, what are we doing?”

This time it was his voice that was hesitant, “I don’t know.” He felt honesty was best, becoming an officer was just the next step. 

She got up and started slowly pacing from the kitchen and living room, “Ok... I am not sure either… Maybe-”

“Please don’t say it.” He walked over to her. He needed to touch her so he cautiously touched her arm. She didn’t resist him. He looked at her, “I want us to be on the same page. I don’t want to upset you, but we need to be honest with each other.”

“But what is that page? You may leave in a few weeks. I…”

Gently he rubbed her arm trying to comfort her, “Tell me.”

“I need to know where we stand. I mean we have only gone on two dates and things are getting… complicated.” What she couldn’t bring herself to say was she had already started falling for him. 

“Well, two and a half if you count the club.”

“Seriously?” Giving him an evil eye that also held humor. 

He loved the look she was giving him, “Seriously.” Looking into her eyes he lowered his voice to almost a whisper, “Dance with me.” 

The intensity of his look held her captive, “There is no music.”

“We don’t need any.” He took her hand, holding it over his heart, he pulled her closer as they gently swayed. Nic moved her hand from his arm to the back of his neck. They were in the same position they had ended their first dance in swaying to their own rhythm. 

He wanted to kiss her. He had wanted to the first night they danced but held back. Holding her in his arms again was all he could take. Slowly, he moved closer until their lips were almost touching. He kept his eyes on hers watching for any sign that she wanted him to stop. She closed her eyes hoping he would take the clue to kiss her. Their lips gently touched, sending a shock wave through both their systems. They fit perfectly together. After an amazing few moments, he pulled back placing his forehead to hers, “That was…”

Her breaths were coming out uneven, “Amazing?”

“Haha, yes, amazing.” 

“Let’s go for a perfect score,” she said as she captured his lips again. She felt his heart start pounding under her hand. Finding her courage she licked his bottom lip. 

At feeling her tongue Conrad started losing control. He maneuvered them so her back was against the wall, pressing his body flush to hers. He gripped her hand a little tighter as his other cupped her face. Their lips gently messaged each other. There was no rush in the kiss. His hand had moved down her arm to the hem of her top as he deepened the kiss. 

She gently pushed on his chest, “Conrad, wait.” She noticed his breath was coming out uneven and his eyes were a much richer shade. She fought the desire to get lost in those eyes. 

He leaned his forehead into hers, “Ok.” 

“I’m sorry,” she said quietly as she ran her hand through his hair. Their hands were still clasped together on his chest. 

“Don’t be sorry. I know we need to talk. I just got a little carried away with the kiss.”

“It was very easy to get carried away by.” Giving him a wonderful smile. 

He cupped her face giving her a reassuring kiss, “Come on let’s talk.” 

He kept hold of her hand as they moved to the couch, “Do you mind if I’m just blunt and to the point?”

“No. Please do. I think that would be easier.” There was so much she needed to tell him. 

“Ok. I have been thinking about this. I would like us to date as much as possible for the next two weeks. Then at the end of the two weeks, we have another talk. See how we feel about things and go from there.” 

“Wow. You have thought about this.” 

“Yes,” he said with a big grin. 

She was quiet for a moment, “Are we still “dating” other people as well?”

That was not the response he anticipated. He hadn’t considered the idea she would want to date other people, “If you want too?”

Nic was genuinely surprised by his reaction to the question. She studied him, “Don’t you?”

He didn’t even have to think, “No”

“Oh. I just-”

He cut her off, “I don’t even have to think about this. I want to date you and only you.” 

His face held so much sincerity she couldn’t help from reaching out to touch him. He turned his face into her touch. She moved closer to him, as her voice came out as a whisper, “Conrad, we are in so much trouble.”

“I know,” as his lips crashed into hers. Right as he was about to move her backward she stopped him. 

Breaking the kiss she took a deep breath, “I need to tell you something that may effect things.”

“Ok.” He asked as he fixed a stray strand of hair, “What is it?”

She couldn’t bring her eyes to meet his, “I am not sure exactly how to tell you this.” 

He took her hand, lacing their fingers together. His other hand gently moved her chin so her eyes would meet his, “Whatever it is you can just say it. You can trust me.”

She couldn’t figure out how to get the words out. She moved her gaze away from him, trying to find the courage, “Mmm, Ok… I’m just going to say it. I have not been in very many relationships… When I was with my last boyfriend we didn't… our relationship well the physical stuff struggled… I couldn’t… well he wasn’t pleased with me…” 

“Pleased with you?” He was confused by what she meant. 

She took a deep breath trying to calm her nerves, “Physically.”

Now he was completely lost, “But why?”

“I couldn’t… well I hadn’t done much before him… he moved a lot faster than I wanted… then I couldn’t orgasm… he never came around me after that.” as the words sputtered out, embarrassment crept into every fiber of her being. 

He sat truly stunned. She started to release her hand from his but he tightened his grip, “Please don’t. I am just trying to process.”

“Conrad, this is too complicated. Everything about this is too complicated. I blame myself. It’s my fault.” 

He really hadn’t heard much of what she had just said. His mind was in overdrive, “Is there a medical reason?”

“No,” she wiped a tear away quickly hoping he didn’t see. “Just my inability,” her voice came out shaky. 

He watched her carefully. He considered her wording. Her “inability” was an odd way to phrase it. Suddenly the realization hit him, “Did he hurt you?”

No response. She couldn’t look at him. The tears were starting to fall freely.

Conrad could feel his blood pressure rising. He understood her silence. In a very quiet, controlled voice he asked, “Did he force you?” 

At this point, her head was down. Then he saw her head barely nod. At first, he couldn’t move. He was angry at anyone who would harm her and heartbroken by the sight in front of him. Then he heard her, “I’m sorry Conrad.” 

That caused him to snap out of his thoughts, “No, Nic, I’m sorry. I’m so very sorry for what happened.” Cautiously, he moved towards her wrapping his arms around her as she cried. He tenderly kissed her forehead, “It’s ok you are safe with me.”

“This is too complicated. I’m sorry. We shouldn’t do this.” She started to pull back from him. 

The grip he had around her stayed steady, “Too complicated for me or you? I’m not waiting to run away.” He looked her in the eyes, “I will never deliberately hurt you or force you to do anything you don’t want too. I’m flawed in many ways but not that. I would rather die.”

This was not the reaction she had feared. She felt safe, even calmed by his embrace. Leaning in closer she captured his lips. 

It took him a split second to get over the surprise. Her hand moved up his neck to the back of his head. She surprised him again by moving over him. Placing a leg on each side of his lap straddling him. He was quickly becoming hard but she sat just back from intimately touching. 

He broke the kiss, placing light kisses down her jawline to her neck. The kisses turned to nips and slight suction. Nic moaned as he applied perfect pressure on the pulse point of her neck while her hands gripped his hair. The tug of his hair sent a surge of lust through his body and a moan from his lips. His response caused Nic to moan. She was not used to her body responding in such a strong way. 

He was beyond excited but knew he needed to take his cues from her, “Nic tell me what you like.”

Her mind was so clouded by his actions she wasn’t sure what he was asking, “What do you mean?” 

He smiled at the sound in her voice. She was as caught up in the moment as he was. Giving her a quick kiss on the lips he pulled back. Both them breathing a little harder than normal, “I mean what excites you?” 

“I don’t know,” she was embarrassed by the question. She started to move from her current position. 

“Wait where are you going?” He gently started rubbing her back, “I’m comfortable like this. Aren’t you?” 

His grin looked almost innocent. It was so cute she had to lean in and kiss him. She smiled back, “Yes, I guess this is.” 

“Good. So tell me what do you like? What makes you turned on?” 

“I really don’t know,” her face started turning red. 

He found her shyness adorable, “Come on Nic. For this to work, we will have to talk with each other. I know it’s difficult for you but I want you to feel comfortable with me.” 

She rubbed the back of his neck, “I think it is also hard because it’s not a question I have considered. I’m sure that sounds way more self-sacrificing than I mean it too. I think the biggest turn on is something I didn’t even know I was truly missing. Someone who puts me first. That makes me feel very turned. Physically I think my answer is I don’t know yet. I know I really like kissing you.” Giving him a huge smile. 

Conrad viewed most women as having a road map to what they wanted out of a partner. Usually, it was something that came to mind right away. Her answer was very different from others. Not that he was surprised. She was very different from the others. He gave her a sexy grin, “Well we will have fun figuring out the details. Remember, no matter what, you are always the one with total control. If you want to stop anything at any time just tell me. No matter what. Agreed.” 

She looked away but nodded her head. 

His voice was soft, “Nic, look at me.” 

When she met his eyes they were so caring her fears were silenced, “I agree.” 

“Good,” his voice was low as he moved in to capture her lips again. 

He moved his hands to her back and slowly moved them under her shirt. When she felt his hands she let out a slight moan. He made little circles with his fingers but never moved further than that. For a while, they just kissed. Both of them loved the feeling of the other's lips. 

Kissing had never been so satisfying to him. He didn’t want the night to end but he also didn’t want to push things. So he moved back leaning his forehead to hers, “It is getting late, I should get going. I will call you when I get home ok?”

Then she leaned into him giving a tender kiss, “Thank you. For everything.”

He took her into his arms, “I haven’t done anything for you to be thankful for… yet.” Giving her a wink. 

As they got up she rolled her eyes. She walked him to the door, “Goodnight Conrad.”

He leaned in kissing her again, “Goodnight Nicolette.”

She watched him walk to the car letting out a little sigh. Shutting the door she leaned into it thinking to herself how much trouble she was in.


	4. The Georgia Aquarium

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am very sorry this took so long to get up. I had majority of it finished for weeks but had to pull extra shifts at work due to the increase of COVID cases in the area. Please say a prayer for all front line workers who are still battling the virus.   
> Ok, this chapter was fun to write! A friend gave me an idea to suggest readers do a virtual tour of somewhere to get our minds off all the craziness going on. So I am sharing that with you all and may continue the idea in future chapters. I picked one of my favorite places in Atlanta which is the Georgia Aquarium. Please take a minute to take a virtual tour if you can't go in person. If you copy the link below then drag the yellow guy (street view) into the Aquarium you can see the places I mention. You can also go to the Aquarium website to see live cams. As always look forward to feedback. 
> 
> https://www.google.com/maps/place/Georgia+Aquarium/@33.7634708,-84.3957127,18z/data=!4m5!3m4!1s0x0:0xfed77076a9af4adc!8m2!3d33.763382!4d-84.3951098

The next morning went by quickly. Nic and Mina meet for lunch. They had formed a normal routine between them. Nic valued their friendship more than any other. She had been there at the start of hers and AJ’s relationship. Now she hoped Mina could help her sort out things.

“So he basically wants to “speed date” for two weeks. How do you feel about that?” 

“Well, I hadn't thought about it in that context.” Took a moment to ponder, “I really like him. There is something different when I am with him. I can’t explain and I know that sounds like a ridiculous fairy tale.”

Mina studied Nic for a moment. She loved Nic like a sister. Watching Nic go through her last relationship ended with her wanting to kill a man. Mina decided to voice what Nic wouldn’t or maybe couldn’t, “You have fallen for him.”

Nic just looked at her. She knew she wasn’t actually asking a question; it was a statement. She wanted her to be wrong, but she knew she wasn’t. 

Mina wasn't sure how to respond. She knew that the two would hit it off but she wasn’t considering it to be this quick. Mina had come to adore Conrad. He and the boys meant a lot to her. Conrad was a difficult person at first but once you got past that he was a solid, caring, loyal, person. She knew all these things are why she set them up. However, she hadn’t imagined them to respond this quickly to each other. 

She considered her response carefully, “You know I like the idea of the two of you. I pushed you all to meet. I’m just concerned with how fast things are moving.”

“I know I am too.” She looked down at the table, “I’m not sure how to slow them down or even if I want to. Time is limited or at least it could be. I don’t want regrets. But yes. I’m concerned about how quickly my emotions became a part of things.”

“I think you need to talk with him. Be honest about where you are right now. He needs to know. Also, you both need to show the skeletons in your closet.”

“I don’t have a clue what you could be talking about. I’m sure we both have clean closets,” her eyes showed the orneriness of her response. 

Mina rolled her eyes, “Right. Seriously, though consider bringing those things to light sooner rather than later. Conrad is a complex person. He doesn’t open up easily.”

“Sounds like you know a lot about him.”

“I do. Do you think I would push you towards someone I didn’t?” Giving her a knowing smile.

“Good point,” they packed up their stuff as Nic headed off to her afternoon lecture. 

The next week flew by quickly. Nic and Conrad were trying to spend time together but finding a new routine had proven tough. A few lunch/coffee dates plus a couple minor make-out sessions were about it. Finally, another weekend had arrived.

The guys had met up at the gym located between their places. They had spent a good hour working out deciding to end the day in the sauna room. AJ and Devon had noticed a difference in Conrad over the past few days but weren’t sure how to approach it. Conrad almost forgot to spot Devon. This only made them more concerned about him. As they all sat in the hot room AJ thought now would be as good of a time as any to figure out what was eating at him. 

“Hawkins. I know you are not overly talkative but you are definitely not here with us. You good?” AJ said in a serious yet serious tone. 

Conrad snapped out of his thought, “I’m good. Why?”

Jumping in Devon kept a lighthearted tone, “Well, for one, you walked away while you were supposed to be spotting me. I’m confident and all but that is the whole point of us all meeting here.” 

Sighing Conrad acknowledged their points, “I am sorry. My mind is not here at the moment.”

“Awh, someone has a big weekend planned,” a smirk formed on AJ’s face.

Conrad couldn’t stop grinning, “Something like that.”

“Oh, now you have my attention! What are the big plans?” Devon asked with genuine curiosity. 

“Ha ha, Nope,” Conrad moved towards the locker room to change with the other two close behind. 

AJ’s tone became serious, “Conrad you know I have come to see you as a brother. However, if you hurt Nic I will have to kick your ass.” 

“I will be next in line to kick your ass,” Devon gave a slight nod. 

Though both guys were smiling Conrad knew they were serious, “I would never do anything to deliberately hurt Nic. If I did I hurt her I won’t even put up a fight. I would want you to beat the shit out of me.”

He found it endearing that both guys felt protective of her. He wondered if they knew any details of Nic's past. Had they known the full truth he was sure the man wouldn’t be alive. The guys continued to poke at Conrad for details but he wouldn’t cave. Once at home he changed for the evening. He put on a black long sleeve shirt and black jeans. Since it was a little cold out he grabbed his dark heather blue pullover on the way out of the door. 

Nic had been a nervous wreck trying to get ready. Conrad hadn’t told her any details except to dress casually which for a girl does not provide enough details. She decided on a navy blue cold shoulder v-neck sweater and black jeans. It was a good medium weight outfit that was perfect for the start of fall weather. She heard his distinct knock on the door right as she finished getting ready. Taking a deep breath she tried to settle her nerves as she walked to the front of the house. When she opened the door her breath was taken away at the sight before her. 

For a moment they both just stared at each other. He finally found his voice, “You look stunning.”

She couldn’t help from blushing at the genuine sound in his compliment, “You don’t look too bad yourself.” She gave him a lovely grin, “We also match perfectly.”

“I think we do too,” he quickly took her hand, “Come on we have a big date tonight.” 

She couldn’t help but giggle at the impish look on his face. It helped to break the tension from his admission. When they made it to his Bronco he opened the door for her. She watched him as he got in, “So where are we going on this date?”

He started the car and just grinned at her. 

“Really… you are not going to tell me?” her eyes narrowed at him. 

Before he took off he reached over giving her a light kiss, “Really.”

“You're ridiculous,” she laughed at him then ran her hand from his neck down his arm taking his hand, “But I like you.”

Though a seemingly obvious admission still made his heart flutter. He interlaced their fingers and kissed the back of her hand, “I like you too.” He pulled into the parking lot for the Georgia Aquarium, “Alright. We are here”

He jumped out of the car so quickly she hardly had to wait for him to open her door, “I do love the aquarium but I’m pretty sure they are about to close.” 

“They are about to close but it helps who you know,” he held out his hand waiting for her to take it. 

She giggled at the excitement in his eyes so she took hold of his hand. As they approach the front door a man coming out of a side door yelled at Conrad’s name. 

“Coming your way Thomas!” As they made it in the door the men exchanged a quick hug, “Thomas this is Nicolette Nevin. Nic this is Thomas Moore.”

Thomas quickly extended his hand to her, “Nice to meet you, Miss. Nevin.”

She shook, “Nice to meet you, Thomas. Please just call me Nic.” 

“Will do Miss. Nic,” he said, giving her a quick wink. “Hawkins I’m sure you can find your way back. Dinner is in the warmer. Don’t hesitate to radio me if you need anything.” He handed Conrad a hand radio, “I plan to meet you at the trainer door in just over an hour.”

Conrad gave an affirmative nod, “I will radio ahead.”

Then he took Nic’s hand as they leisurely made their way through the Aquarium. Nic began to wonder how/why he seemed so comfortable. 

“I used to volunteer all of my free time here. It was-is- like a sanctuary for me. I haven’t been here as much recently.” 

She barely heard him as they walked the tunnel in the Ocean Voyager area. With no one else there everything was… quiet… she was in awe. It was so quiet it caused her to whisper, “What could keep you away from this?”

He had been watching her take in everything. His voice matched hers, “You.”

She froze causing him to stop as well. The look on her face left nothing to the imagination. She was shocked by his response. Tenderly he moved his hand to her neck, then he leaned in giving her a slow kiss. As he pulled back he kissed her forehead. He led her the rest of the way down the tunnel and to the viewing room. The floor to ceiling view was as awe-inspiring as the tunnel. There was a candlelit table with two chairs located in the middle of the room. She let his hand go as she took in the sight before her. 

The expansive view drew Nic in. She was overwhelmed by everything. She turned to look at him but saw him leaning against the wall, staring at her with a huge grin on his face. She practically ran to him, kissing him senseless. The impact caused him to be pushed fully into the wall. Both her hands moved into his hair as his hands moved to her back pulling her as close as possible. When they pulled back they were breathing deeply. Her voice came out breathy, “Conrad-”

Hearing his name come off her lips caused him to groan. He switched their position pushing her against the wall. His lips found hers in a searing kiss. The way her body fit him was perfect. She was completely caught off guard by his response but wasted no time kissing him back. As he moved a trail down her jawline to her neck, she couldn’t help the soft moan that escaped. Her hands had a death grip on the front of his pullover. His hip thrust into her causing her to yelp from both the shock and the pleasure. He froze. Things had moved too fast. Resting his head at the space between her neck and shoulder he tried desperately to regain control of his body. Placing a gentle kiss on her neck he pulled back to look at her. It was a beautiful sight, her eyes were dark with lust, her breathing was calming down, but her slight smile was what got his heart. 

In the most innocent way possible he smiled back at her, “Sorry.”

Her hands still clenched his pullover, in a low tone she responded, “I’m not.”

The realization she wanted him caused a surge of lust to course through him. He slammed his lips to her, taking her bottom lip tugging it as thrust into her again. The moan that escaped her lips was louder than she expected causing her to blush. A low growl vibrated throughout his chest. He held her close as he kissed her senseless. Moving his lips from her lips to her cheek over to her ear. 

“You don’t understand the effect you have on me,” his voice came out so deep and rough. He felt her shiver causing him to grin. Kissing a path back to her lips giving her a tender kiss, “Come on we don’t want our food to get cold.”

A wave of panic hit her. They were in the middle of a very public area while having a very heated makeout session, “Oh my God. We were on camera!” All the color drained from her face. The horrid look caused him to chuckle which resulted in a smack across the arm. “Conrad! It’s not funny!!!”

Even though she sounded mad he could see her trying to hold back a laugh, “We are two feet away from the camera range. Other than the fish no one saw the show.” Relief flooded her face as he kissed her forehead, “I would never knowingly expose us. Have a little faith in me.” 

She returned his contagious grin, “I do... Ok, let’s eat.”

He didn’t want to let her go so he gave her one more kiss running his hands down her arms, interlacing the fingers. Taking a deep breath before gently backing away, “Ok. Let's go.”

He pulled out the chair for her. The food was still hot as he put the plates down. They both started to eat, taking in view of the fish while stealing glances at each other. The conversation stayed light while they ate. Once they were finished they took a minute to clean up. She moved the last of things off the table when she turned back Conrad had a blanket laid out for them. 

The sight warmed her heart even more to him, “You have just thought of everything. Or do you have practice at such things?”

He knew she was teasing him, “No.” He was still smiling at her but his tone was a little more serious, “You bring out a very different side in me.”

As she walked to him she put her arms around his neck and he automatically moved his around her waist. They had become very comfortable holding each other, “Dance with me.” 

The request made him light up, “Gladly.” 

They began to sway back and forth. He gently moved his hands up and down her back. She played with his hair at the back of his neck. 

At that moment she was honest with herself. She was falling in love with Conrad Hawkins. Obviously, she didn’t want to force him, but she wanted him to stay. The idea he could decide to go back into the Marines killed her. She didn’t know if they… whatever they were... could do a long-distance relationship.

Noticing something had changed in her he pulled back from their embrace enough to see her face, “Hey is something wrong?”

All her uncertainty was removed when she saw how much he cared. She leaned in giving him a slow lingering kiss. Then she took in a breath, “I don’t want this night to end. Will you stay with me tonight? I don’t want to give you the wrong idea. I am not ready to have sex, but I’m ready to take the next step.”

Their swaying slowed as he listened intently to her. Carefully, he took in everything she said, “That sounds amazing.”

He kissed her but there was nothing rushed. They kept swaying for a little bit longer then he moved them to the blanket. She was still a little nervous, but nothing like before. Something about him was calming to her. He straightened out the blanket. She smiled sweetly at him as he helped her, “Thank you.”

“I want to ask you something. I’m not sure how to word it…” 

His eyes seemed to be searching hers for permission. She gently moved her hand across his cheek, “It’s ok. Just ask it.”

“Will I be the first guy you have been… with... besides your ex? I mean how far have you gone before? What I’m trying to say… I’m trying to make sure you are-“

“Just let me try to help you. Other than what we have done my ex is the only one I went farther with. Why?” 

“I just want to make sure you are as comfortable as possible. The more I know the better I can make it.”

She shifted her eyes away from him, “I’m nervous about everything.”

“I don’t want you to be nervous. I don’t want you to feel like I’m pushing you either.” He took her hand in his. 

“It’s not that,” she had no idea how to word it. She was nervous about not measuring up, about flashbacks of the past, about not being able too…. 

He tenderly moved her chin up so she would look at him, “Then what is it?” When she didn’t respond he continued, “Nic, I want you. I think that is obvious. But I want you to want me the same way. The rest we will work out.”

There was something so genuine in the way he spoke. She held his gaze, “I-”

A loud voice came over the radio, “Conrad, my ETA is 20 minutes.”

The radio even startled Conrad causing him to mumble a cuss word or two under his breath as fumbled with it, “Thank you, Thomas. Our ETA will be the same.”

It was rare to see him frazzled which caused Nic to giggle a little as she watched him. After he replied she took his hand back in hers and waited for him to look back at her, “I want you too.”

Letting out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, “Good.” Then he cupped her neck and pulled her closer to him kissing her breathless. The kiss lasted longer than expected. It took all his self-control to stop, “Come on we must go.”

They walked back through the tunnel down through other exhibits until they arrived at the other side of the aquarium. Thomas walked outside of the door right as they approached, “Come on back. How was dinner?”

Nic quickly answered, “Perfect! Thank you for everything.”

He smiled back at her, “Great! Alright Conrad you know where your gear is located. Miss Nic if you would come with me, and I will get you settled.”

Conrad slowly let go of her hand as he walked over to a small set of lockers. Nic followed Thomas to a different room as he proceeded to pull gear for her. She watched him carefully as she debated asking a question but curiosity got the best of her, “How long has Conrad been volunteering here?”

“Off and on for almost 2 years now. I have known him for 4 years though. We were assigned the same unit and deployed together. He was our Doc. Marine language for medic. Most can do more than basic skills so that is why we don’t call them medics. Conrad was already in medical school on our last deployment so it fit him even more. Here try this boot on.”

The next few minutes she spent trying on different things from boots to wet gear. Conrad had been pulled in to help someone as she finished up getting dressed. She found the courage to ask the question that had been on her mind, “So Thomas I have a question I would like to keep between us.”

Thomas eyed her for a moment, “Alright Miss Nic.”

“How many other women has Conrad brought here? Like on a date,” her voice was hesitant, she was afraid of the answer. 

A smile formed on Thomas’s face, “Oh that is an easy question only you. As a matter of fact ma’am, I have never seen him look at someone the way he looks at you. It is obvious he cares for you very much.”

Nic took a second to let sink in, “What would it take to be able to volunteer with him?”

“I think I can make that happen. Now that I have met you I see what is keeping him away. Give me your number and I will get everything set up for you.”

She blushed slightly at his comment, “Here you go.” Handing the number over to him, “Just give me a call.” She smiled brightly at him. 

Conrad came around the corner right as she handed Thomas her number. He quickly looked at her and noticed the blush on her cheeks. At that moment every ounce of joy left him. He couldn’t move. He just stood there watching the scene play out. 

As she turned to put her boots she saw Conrad, “Hey I’m almost ready. Sorry, it took me a while to get the right size.” 

He didn’t say anything. He didn’t know what to say. A radio went off calling Thomas to his office. He apologized and promised he would be back quickly. 

At this point, Conrad's silence had caught her attention. She watched him carefully as he nodded at Thomas but again didn’t say anything. She walked towards, but as she neared she swore he stiffened, “Conrad is something wrong?”

Silence. 

Very carefully she placed a hand on his chest and another on his cheek, “Tell me what is wrong.”

It was a very intimate gesture for them. As if he had no control his body melted ever so slightly into her touch. He looked down at her, “I saw you give Thomas your number.”

“You did. Did you see why?” She knew she should be frustrated with him for doubting her, however, his eyes look confused and almost fearful, not anger. 

“No,” his voice was barely there when he replied. 

The hand on his cheek was now resting just below his ear, “I wanted to be able to volunteer with you. This place is amazing. Thank you so much for sharing it with me. I thought this could be something we do together.”

His expression showed his surprise. But quickly replaced with a smile which showed all the way to the crinkles around his eyes. As he started to speak she cut him off with a fervent kiss. After the kiss ended they stayed in each other’s arms while they waited.

Upon Thomas’s arrival, they started a behind the scene tour. Conrad watched Nic thoroughly enjoy holding baby penguins, feed otters, and watch the trainers work with the dolphins. Seeing the level of joy she had in this part of his life endeared her even more to him. It stirred in him a question he had been avoiding. Become an officer and continue serving with the Marines he has come to see as family… or… accept an internship and start settling into a new family life of a hospital, maybe into a life with her. 

As they left the aquarium Nic couldn't wipe the smile off her face it had been the best date ever. She was constantly being amazed by this man. Their hands were interlaced as they made their way to the car. He opened the door for her, she reached up giving him a slow, lingering kiss. Running her hand from the back of his head down until it rested on his chest. 

The kiss only stopped out of her need to breathe. Their breaths were mixed in the cold air, “Thank you for everything. This has been an amazing night.”

Pushing her up against the car he leaned into her, “It’s not over yet.” 

His voice was so low it made a tingle run down her spine. Closing the gap he kissed her again. It was slow like her kiss but she felt the intensity go up. Everything felt different: his touch, his gaze, his voice. Sure she still felt nervous about things, but she also felt excited by him. He moved slightly back from her so she could get in the car. She smiled up at him, while moving away her hand moved down his torso causing him to inhale sharply. When he sat down in the driver's seat he glanced sideways at her as he started the car. She was looking at him as well. Both let out a small breath as they started towards her house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is about to get steamy. The next chapter, probably all future ones, will be for adult audiences only.


	5. First Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is where the story starts to get steamy. Going forward mature audience only due to sexual scenes and reference of past trauma from an abusive relationship. The couple will have to tackle how memories or triggers can effect their relationship. Conrad will also be dealing with his past later. I hope you enjoy it and have a great weekend! I look forward to your feedback.

Thankfully the drive was short, both pretended to listen to the music on the radio. When they made it to her driveway he put the car in park and turned to her. She was starting to get out of the car, but she felt his hand on her knee causing her to turn to him. 

“Nic, I want to make sure we are on the same page about something. I sometimes-tend to-normally,” he let out a frustrated sigh, not being able to find the right words. 

She put her hand on top of his hand but didn’t say anything. Seeing him nervous was oddly comforting. 

After looking down at their hands he met her eyes, “I tend to take control, maybe guide is a better word, in… bed. So I want to explain how my brain works here. No matter what, tonight-any night, you have the power to start or stop or slow down anything at any time. I will never judge you or be mad or upset with you. I know you are not ready for sex or at least intercourse yet. I want us to have fun. Just be honest with me and trust me. Ok?”

She looked into his pleading eyes and her heart melted, “I will. I do trust you.”

A huge smile formed on his face. He wasn’t sure what it was but her trusting him meant more than he could put into words. Taking her hand he kissed it. 

“Let’s go inside,” she smiled sweetly at him. 

“Wait. Umm… One more thing.”

“Ok?” 

“I have a Go Bag I keep in my car. Just in case I need it for anything. I promise it’s not like I planned this I just keep it at all times.”

A Go Bag. Sure she had one that she kept under her bed. She had one since her Prehospital class but not in her car. This man was always prepared. She decided to tease him, “I’m sure it gets good use.” 

“Nic, I prom-” he was cut off by her lips. 

She cut the kiss off quickly, “I’m teasing you, Conrad. Get your bag, I'm going to unlock the door.” 

As she was about to move away from him he grabbed the back of her head so she couldn’t move, kissing her deeply. She moaned, kissing back with the same intensity. When he released her from the kiss they were both breathing heavily. He leaned his forehead to hers, “You are amazing.”

She smiled at him, “So are you. Come on let’s go.”

Once inside she locked the door then turned back to him, “I’m going to wash off real quick and change. My room is straight ahead. You can follow me. I will show you where to put your bag.” 

They walked into her room, “Do you mind if I clean up a bit too?”

“Not at all. Why don’t you go ahead while I grab my clothes?”

“You sure?”

“Of course.” 

He disappeared into the bathroom while she got them some water and pulled out her clothes. She was thankful it was the weekend and neither one of them had somewhere to be in the morning. As she came back into the room he was coming out. 

“All yours.”

“Thank you.”

The ease she felt in the car had started to dissipate. Though she wanted to do this, fears of the past were creeping into her mind. As she finished up she took a moment to gather herself before she went back out. When she opened the door Conrad was waiting on the side of the bed.

“Hi,” she smiled as she walked towards him. 

“I didn’t know if you had a particular side of the bed,” he stood and put his hands on her waist. 

“No I’m fine either way,” she wrapped her arms around his neck. 

“Wonderful,” he scooped her up in his arms causing her to giggle with excitement. As he gently placed her in the bed, he noted how much he loved hearing her laugh. Then joined her, hovering on top of her, “Is this ok?”

“Yes,” she grinned at him, “this is perfect.”

In a low sexy voice, he responded, “I aim to please.”

She rolled her eyes at him right before he kissed her. Their lips seem to be made for each other. Kissing helped ease the uncertainty that had crept into both of them. Her hands went under his shirt roaming his back. She decided to help him understand how comfortable she was by inching his shirt up. Finally, she pushed him back slightly so she could tug it off. Then she froze seeing the tattoo that laid perfectly over his heart. Her fingers moved over the Eagle, Globe, and Anchor tattoo with care. 

Conrad watched her earnestly. If he hadn’t been turned on before he most certainly was now. Watching her eyes darken as she looked him over, excited him. The feel of her hands on his skin was even better than he imagined. 

Then her eyes met his, “When did you get this?”

“It was something my mentor suggested I do. He died in one of my first firefights. I got it to honor both him and the Marines I served.”

“You have the heart of a Marine,” her eyes show her awe for him. 

Her response moved him. It felt like her eyes were piercing into his soul. He hesitated for a moment then asked something he had been curious about the first night they met, “When we danced you said Marines have your heart. What did you mean?”

She was shocked he remembered the comment, “My grandfather was a Marine. I loved him so much. He loved the Corp and how it had shaped his life. I lost him a few years ago. He set the standard for the man I want in my life… I know I have made some mistakes but I know what I want.”

He responded gently, “We have all made mistakes.” He really wasn’t sure if he wanted the answer to his next question. Not wanting fear to hold him back he asked the question, “Could I be what you want?”

She saw such vulnerability she couldn’t resist tenderly running her hand over his face while the other played with the hair at the base of his neck. Nic’s response came out like a whisper, “Yes. I’m afraid you could be.”

Conrad let out a sigh of relief, “Don’t be afraid. We can figure it out.” 

Nic brought his face closer to hers, “I want us too.”

Then she kissed him with renewed passion. His mind was completely focused on the amazing woman in his arms. His lips moved to her chin down the column of her neck then paused. She had on a flannel button-up top with a matching bottom. 

His fingers moved to the button, but his eyes moved to meet hers, “Is this ok?”

Her breathing had picked from both nerves and excitement, “Yes”

Moving back to his task he opened the button. For each button he opened he kissed the newly exposed flesh. He didn’t pull the fabric away, instead just let it move aside. His kiss left her skin feeling like it was on fire. She was now breathing quickly and her face was flushed. When he was just past her breast he realized she didn’t have a bra on. 

“God Nic,” his words came out as a groan. 

“What?” Her voice came out strained. 

“No bra,” he mumbled against her skin as continued his way down. 

“Figured it would get in the way,” she bit her lip to contain her moan as he made it to the last button. 

He grabbed the waistband of her pants and looked up at her, “Can I take these off of you?”

Looking at him he had the sexiest grin. Words escaped her so she simply nodded yes. He took his time removing them. He kissed and tasted her skin on her legs. Once they were off he carelessly discarded them. Using a fingertip touch he moved back up her legs stopping just beneath her breast. Feeling his fingers run over her skin made her breathing difficult. She pulled him closer to her, their lips met in a heated kiss. Finding the courage she started removing her top. Knowing she was nervous he continued the kiss a little longer hoping to relax her. He had figured one thing out about her: she loved to be kissed. Once she seemed more at ease he pulled back to look at her. Instantly, her hands moved to cover herself. Tenderly he caught her hands and interlaced their fingers. He leaned back in kissing her sweetly. 

Touching his forehead to hers he pleaded “Please let me look at you.”

He held his place till she responded quietly, “Ok.”

Finally, he drew back and let out a deep groan, “Nic look at me.”

Fear kept her from responding. She couldn’t take the judgmental eyes or even worse disappointment. Not from him. 

Conrad was lost, how could she be self-conscious she was gorgeous? Then it hit him… the man before him (he hated even calling him a man) was the memory he had to fight against. His lips placed feather-like kisses on her eyelids, cheeks, and nose. Then lingered on her forehead to remind her who she was with. 

“Nicolette, look at me?” his voice was soft as he tried to bring her back to the present. 

At hearing her full name spoken so tenderly from him she looked up.

“You are absolutely perfect,” his eyes expressed the sincerity of his words. 

“Conrad,” she spoke his name in disbelief. Before he had a chance to respond her hands were in his hair pulling him to her for a breathtaking kiss. 

The kiss evolved, his hand moved to her chest. His touch was very light drawing half circles on the top of her breast slowly moving towards her nipple. This elicited a moan muffled by their kiss. When his fingers reached her nipple she threw her head back biting her lip to stifle the moan coming deep from within her. This allowed his lips to trail down her sternum pausing when he was even with her breast. 

As he slowly moved up the side of her breast he accented every kiss, “You. Are. Breathtaking.”

She was squirming from the pleasure he was creating. Sure she had fooled around with a few guys but they had never taken the time to care about her pleasure the way he did. His lips made it to her nipple. His tongue traced the edge before taking the nipple between his lips gently sucking it. Her back bowed off the bed as the pleasure he was building started to intensify in her. 

“Conrad,” his name escaped her lips as a breathy moan. 

Hearing his name caused him to groan. That was a sound he wanted to hear again. Wanting to avoid any triggers from her past he went from hovering over her to laying flush against her side. He didn’t want her to feel stuck yet at the same time wants her to know he was there. 

“Put your arm around me,” his voice was gentle. 

Nic did as he said and moved her hand around his shoulder into his hair pulling him in for a kiss. The hand on her breast began to slowly trace patterns down her stomach. Upon reaching her lower stomach she tensed. 

“Breath baby,” his voice was low and reassuring. A wave of hesitation fell over him, “Nothing I am going to do will hurt you. You are in control.”

She felt ridiculous for needing so much reassurance but she also was very grateful for him caring. She pulled him in close, right before their lips met, “I know.”

The kiss deepened quickly. Kissing Conrad was like breathing for Nic. She felt both calmed and excited. The hand on her lower stomach traced a few patterns before moving lower. His hand made it to her core where he lightly cupped her causing her hips to buck. However, he didn’t move away; he just rested there for a moment. Their lips parted as she gasped from the sensation the pressure was creating. He kissed his way to a particularly sensitive spot, just below her ear, he had found earlier. Finally, he dipped a finger into her very wet slit. 

“You are so wet for me Nic,” he let out a groan. 

Between his lowered voice, his breath on her neck, and his words her entire body shivered adding the pressure building at her core. Her only response was a deep moan and quickened breath. Then her muscle started to contract uncontrollably. Feeling her contract around his finger made him groan into her neck again. He rubbed his thumb over her clit. 

“Conrad,” his name came out as a moan of both pleasure and uncertainty. 

In a low whisper, he encouraged her, “Let go, baby. Just breath. I’ve got you.”

She couldn’t take it anymore. There was no containing her scream. Her entire body clenched, bowed then convulsed as pleasure shot through every nerve ending. He kept gently thrusting until her body came to rest. He was completely struck by the fact her flushed skin, extra breaths, and rapidly beating heart was because of him. It wasn’t pride in himself instead, it was something he cherished. 

“God you are amazing,” he spoke with such reverence kissing her neck, then cheek then nibbled on her bottom lip as she came back to earth. 

She dug her hands into his hair as though her very life depended on it. He was more than happy to return the kiss deepening it. When the kiss ended he looked into her eyes, he saw tears. 

He gently cupped her cheek, “Hey. Hey, what is wrong?” 

The concern in his eyes only made her tears fall quicker, “Nothing. Everything is wonderful. I’m sorry, just emotional. I bet you want to take back your amazing comment.”

A small smile formed. He wasn’t sure she had heard him, but as he wiped away her tears, “Not at all.” 

He moved them so they could be a little more comfortable. Nic took the opportunity to look him over a little better. He was beautiful as her eyes fell lower on him she could see him straining against his boxers. 

A sudden concern fell over her, “Oh God Conrad, I’m so sorry. What about you?”

It took him a second to catch what she meant. He gave a slight chuckle and ran a hand over her back, “Don’t worry about him. He will calm down after a bit.”

“I’m sorry I was so lost in me that-”

“Tonight was always supposed to be about you. Not me. We will figure the rest out tomorrow.” A twinkle came to his eye, “You know I propose we spend all day in bed tomorrow.”

She moved into him kissing him slowly as pulled away she kissed down his jaw to his ear. Then in a low seductive voice, “You know I would be careful. I may just take you up on it. By the way… Your aim was perfect, I was very pleased.”

He released a groan slash chuckle remembering his earlier statement. He pulled her close, kissing her forehead, “Goodnight Nicolette.”

She released the giggle she had been holding back then sweetly kissed his neck, “Goodnight Conrad.”

Nic’s head rested on his chest while she lazily traced the tattoo over his heart. The touch soothed both of them to sleep.


	6. Let’s Explore

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok because of this chapter I’m changing my rating to explicit due to sexual content. There is reference to domestic violence in Nic’s past but nothing graphic. As always love Kudos and Comments. 
> 
> On a different note I LOVED the new episode! The flashback to COVID-19 moments felt very real and left me in tears more than once. The wedding was perfect! I’m super excited to watch the rest of the story lines as the season continues.

Conrad watched as the sun crawled across Nic’s shoulders as she laid snuggled into his chest. This was usually when he started planning his way out to avoid the awkwardness of the morning if he even stayed the night. Yet as he laid there watching her all he could think was he never wanted to let her go. The night before played in his mind. So many things stood out to him. Her saying he could be the kind of man she wanted played on a loop. Normally such an admission would result in an immediate, panicked exit strategy, but everything seemed different with her. Subconsciously his fingers had been moving across her arm causing her to stir. 

At first, she just stayed quiet enjoying the feeling of being in his arms. Then her mind went into overdrive about last night. Had she done something wrong? Would he want to spend the day with her? If he did, would he want to repeat last night? 

He noticed her breathing had changed so he pulled her closer,“Good morning.”

His voice came out rough and deep causing a shiver to go down her spine, “Good morning.”

“I am sorry if I woke you,” his fingers had never ceased slowly tracing patterns on her arm. 

“No, it’s fine. What time is it?” 

“Mmm just after 8 I think.” He gently lifted her chin, “How are you this morning?”

Looking into his caring eyes her heart leapt, “I’m amazing. You?”

“Amazing about covers it for me too,” he kissed her, running his hands into her hair.

The kiss took on a life of its own until she heard his stomach grumble. She tried to contain her laugh which only made him laugh as well, “How does breakfast sound?”

“Wonderful! I can make something or help make something,” giving her a smile. 

Laughing at him, “Oh good we get to test our cooking skills together!”

“You know I think we have made it to that level.”

“I’m glad you feel that way,” she patted his chest, “Give me a few minutes to get ready.”

“Ok,” he kissed her forehead as he slowly untangled them. 

Right as she went to get out of the bed the fact she was naked. She quickly clenched the sheets to herself. 

He glanced at her, “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t have any clothes on.”

He looked at her like she had lost her mind, “Yes… Don’t you remember last night?”

“Yes! I remember last night! I just forgot about not putting anything… well back on,” her face turned a deep shade of red. 

The deep laughter that came from him changed her from feeling embarrassed to truly annoyed with him. He walked around the room and retrieved his shirt and her underwear. When he went to hand them to her she was glaring at him. He tried to stifle his laughter, “You do understand I have seen you with no clothes on right?”

Her face became red hot, “I’m well aware. I currently don’t know how you managed that with the charm you are currently using. Now if you don’t mind.”

He completely surprised her by capturing her lips kiss. When he spoke his voice was husky, “Your body is amazing and I fully intend on enjoying your nakedness in the near future. For now, I will compromise with you by giving you my shirt and your underwear to wear. Deal?”

She rolled her eyes but pulled him back in for a kiss, “Deal.” 

After Conrad got ready he had made his way to the kitchen to start the coffee as Nic got ready. The pot had just started to brew when he heard her come in. Turning to see her his eyes raked over her body: her hair still down, no makeup, his shirt just long enough for her panties to be covered, followed by her long legs. His breath became shallow as his heart started to race. The next action was strictly reflex as he pushed her against the nearest flat surface kissing her senseless. She was thankful for the wall being so close behind her if not she wasn’t sure she could have held herself up. She was at a loss as to his reaction. 

“Wow,” was the only word he could get to come out of his mouth. 

“I would say so but what is wow?” She was truly befuddled by his response. 

“You in only my shirt. Other than you with no clothes on I can’t think of a sexier look.” 

Her eyebrow arched giving him a whatever look. 

“What?” He responded in a husky voice, “You don’t believe me?”

Before she had the opportunity to respond his lips were back on hers. He quickly moved down to her neck then thrust into her gently so she could feel the effect she had on him. The moan she had tried to keep at bay escaped much loader than expected. Feeling her tense he moved back to look at her. 

“I am sorry I was so loud,” she spoke so fast trying to prevent him from responding. 

“What do you mean?” Then he remembered, “I noticed you biting your lip a lot. I love hearing you respond to me.” He moved his lips so they were almost touching her ear, “It’s a major turn on.” He resumed his previous actions eliciting another moan. For which he responded with a low growl noise of his own, “Unless we are in a public place where we could get caught I want to hear you.”

She ran her hands through his hair, “That is cute that you think we will be doing this in a public place.”

He chuckled at her response, “Just you wait. I will make you want me all the time. You won’t be able to keep your hands off of me. Just like at the Aquarium.” Her mouth dropped and her face blushed an even deeper shade of red. He winked at her as he chuckled. He gave her a quick kiss, “Come on let’s fix something for breakfast.”

“You are lucky I like you. How about pancakes, sausage, and grits?”

“Sounds amazing. How can I help?”

They moved with each other in the kitchen as well as they did on the dance floor. It was quickly becoming obvious there was something different, good different, between them. Even though this was still new there was a great ease about them going about basic tasks. Both of them taking opportunities to steal glances and lingering touches when possible. 

As they were cleaning up from breakfast Conrad decided he wanted to dig a little deeper. Drying his hands after doing the dishes, he turned to Nic who was wiping down the countertops. 

“Hey I want to talk about something but I don’t want to upset you,” leaning against the counter. 

Finishing up the last part of the counter she turned towards him. She sat herself up on the island not sure where this conversion was going to go, “Ok.”

For a moment he just looked at her trying to gather his thoughts, “I am not good about opening up. Which makes it even harder to ask someone else to do it. But I have some questions about your ex.”

Taking a deep breath she braced herself for what he would ask, “Ok.”

Trying to form his words correctly, “I’m worried I’m going to do something to upset you. That something I do will trigger difficult memories. If you feel comfortable talking about it I would like to know anything you want to tell me.”

“It's still difficult to talk about.” She knew he had a point but also didn’t know even where to start, “I went to therapy for a while. Most people don’t understand domestic violence. It’s not just one day he hit me. It started out slow, a small shove progressed into hits then… more. He always told me he was sorry and that he would never do it again and I believed him. I was in a bad place with my family and he had me believing he truly cared me. When… when he forced me in bed that was my wake up call. I still battle feeling ashamed.”

“Why would you feel ashamed? You did nothing wrong.”

“I should have gotten out earlier then certain things wouldn’t have happened,” her voice quivered as she wiped away a tear. 

“I do not see it that way. I see a very strong person who found herself in a horrible situation. I am so glad you found a way out.” 

He stepped up to her and she opened to allow him closer to her. He moved his arms down her arms then moved his arms around her waist. At this height she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and cradled his head. They were both quiet for a moment processing their own thoughts. 

“Oh god did I upset you earlier?” His eyes searched hers. 

Baffled by his response, “What do you mean? When?”

“When I moved you against the wall? I didn't even think through it I just reacted.”

She held his face looking directly into his eyes, “Conrad that action was nothing like what I was referencing. That was something done in fun, not anger. I wish I knew what would trigger those memories. But no, that was amazing.” She gently kissed him to confirm what she said.

He took a deep breath, “What is his name?”

It felt like the wind was knocked out of her, “I can’t tell you that.”

Truly shocked by her response, “Why not?”

“Please Conrad. I do not want you to go do something.”

“Nic its not like I am going to seek him out.”

She looked at him with almost begging eyes.

Then it hit him like a ton of bricks, “I wouldn’t need to seek him out because I know him.”

She looked away, “Most likely.”

“He is my program? He is training to be a doctor.” His voice started to get louder with each word. 

“I-”

How anyone, especially a doctor, do what this man did to her. He was furious at the thought, “Why didn’t you tell me before?” 

“Because I didn’t want you mad at me like you clearly are now!” Now her voice was rising. She pushed him back enough to separate their bodies intending to get away from him. 

He took enough of a step back she could get down if she wanted but moved his hands to her legs. Her statement took him by surprise, “Wait? Why would I be mad at you?

“You think I should have turned him in. That he will just be able to do this again.” The tears fell freely, “I couldn't. I know I should but I couldn’t.” 

He tentatively took a step back to her taking her into his arms, “Hey please understand I am on your side. I am not passing any judgment on you. Me wanting to kill him is what anger was directed towards not you. I’m sorry.”

She pulled back slightly taking his head in her hands, “I can’t let you do that either. I just want to move on past it. I want it to be over.”

He just held her gaze for a moment, “I won’t go after him.” 

She considered everything, “His name is Alec Shaw.” 

Immediately, his jaw clenched. Of course he knew him. They already had their disagreements but she didn’t need to know that. 

“You know him,” noticing his response. 

“Yes,” his jaw was so tightly clenched he could barely get the word out. 

“Please, Conrad.”

He let out a breath, “I won't go after him.”

“Really?” She ran her fingers down his jaw, “It looked like your jaw was about to break.” She bent down to kiss his jaw while she wrapped her legs around him. Then her lips moved to his ear.

He groaned at feeling her lips and pulled her into him, “You are doing a good job of distracting me.” Also genuinely surprised by how her actions calmed him. 

“Good,” she captured his lips moving her tongue against his. 

The knowledge that this amazing woman in front of him only had on his shirt and her panties took priority. He ran his finger up the sides of her legs causing her to squirm. One hand traced her hip as the other moved up her shirt to her breast. His fingers lightly touched the underside of her breast making her want more. The whole time their lips had stayed fused together muffling her small moans. When he lightly pinched her nipple she gasped breaking the kiss. His lips moved down her neck.

“As much as I love seeing you in my shirt, which I do, I would like to see what’s under it more,” he said as he started pulling the shirt up slowly. 

The glint in his eyes was enthralling. She took a small breath to calm her nerves, “Ok.”

He bent down to kiss her stomach gently biting just below her navel. This caused her to moan and shutter. Straightening back up he completely removed the shirt giving her a quick kiss he leaned back. 

He let out a groan then looked into her eyes, “Good god Nic you are stunning.”

Before she could respond he sucked a nipple into his mouth as his other hand lazily traced up her inner thigh. Her hand moved into his hair as she bit her lip to contain her moaning. He noticed the action. 

“Don’t bite your lip. I want to hear you,” he said as he moved to give her other breast the same attention. 

She could only nod as his hand was inching closer to her center. He took her nipple into his mouth, swirling his tongue then applying more pressure. There was no containing her moans. She gripped his shoulder and her hand tightened in his hair. A deep groan came from him. 

“Conrad,” putting her hand on his face she drew him up to look at her. 

“Yes.” He asked gently. 

“Can we take this to the bedroom?” 

“Hell yes!” He picked her up causing her to laugh making him laugh as well.

He gently laid her on the bed quickly discarding his pants leaving them both in just underwear. Joining her on the bed he hovered over her. Then he became concerned from their conversation earlier. So he went to move off of her but she stopped him, “Hey where are you going?”

“I don’t want you to feel trapped.”

“I don’t feel trapped in a bad way,” she saw the confusion in his eyes. Running her hand from his neck into his hair, “I feel protected and cared for, safe.”

His face lit up with joy, “Always. I will always protect you. When you are with me I will take care of you.” He wiggled his eyes making sure she picked up on the double meaning of his words.

She rolled her eyes then her demeanor changed.

Picking up on something, “What is it?” 

“I don’t know how to take care of you.”

He took a hard swallow, “It’s ok. As you get more comfortable we can work on that if you want.”

“I want to touch you.”

“What do you mean?” his heart started to race.

She gently pushed him to rollover, “I want to explore you like you explored me.”

“I am yours to explore,” he happily relaxed back, propped up on the pillows. 

“Is there somewhere you don’t like being touched?” 

“Nope, you can look, touch, feel, taste anywhere you want,” his eyes had an ornery, lustful look. 

She giggled, “Ok.” Her hand felt his neck watching him intently. 

Then she leaned in running her lips from under his ear to his pulse point which she could feel increasing. He lazily ran his hands from her hair, up and down her back. When she gently bit down at his pulse point, he instinctively pulled her closer groaning in pleasure. 

“Is that ok?” she said with a grin.

“Yes.” came out more like a low growl.

It was driving him crazy just laying there. Trying to give her room to explore was not as easy as he thought it would be. She moved down a little kissing his neck to his collarbone. She sucked the sensitive area then dragged her teeth over with enough pressure causing him to groan again. Her hand was moving down his chest. When her hand went past his naval she noticed how much his breathing had changed. Her hand made it to the waistband of his boxers, but her uncertainty got the best of her. 

“I have never been good at this part.”

He took a deep breath to calm himself while reassuring touches up and down her back, “You are doing amazing so far, but only do what you are comfortable with.”

Running her hand down his chest and torso she looked into his eyes, “I want to touch you everywhere.”

“Fuck Nic,” he groaned and grabbed her hip to pull her squarely over his painful erection. He thrust into her causing her to moan, closing her eyes. He quickly flipped them using long and slow thrust to stimulate both of them, “You have no idea how sexy you are.”

Her only response was to pull him down so their lips could meet in a sloppy heated kiss. When their tongue met he sped up his movements. Her hands found their way into his hair tugging like she had earlier. 

“Pull your knees up,” his voice was rough as he spoke. 

She did as he said, effectively spreading her legs further apart. The pressure was more direct on her clit intensifying her pleasure. Fighting the urge to bite her lip she let out a deep moan and pushed her head back into the pillow. This exposed her neck which he was more than happy to attack with his lips and tongue. He moved down her sternum with open mouth kisses. Then he sucked her nipple into his mouth being rewarded with another moan. 

“Conrad. Please,” her hands gripped his shoulder blades.

“That is such a pretty word coming out of your mouth,” he groaned. “What do you want Nic?”

Her mind was clouded with pleasure, “I-”

He had deliberately thrust harder into. Now his voice was stained trying to stay in control, “Tell me what you want Nic.”

“Make me come,” her voice came out breathless. 

He groaned at her words, “It will be my pleasure.”

Then his thrust became quicker and stronger. Her moans started to become one continuous sound. Within minutes she screamed his name repeatedly and her fingers dug into his shoulder as she flew on an amazing high. His thrust slowed but continued to rub her through her orgasm until her body relaxed. He rested his body against her while placing light kisses across her face as she recovered. When she came back her hands traced his back.

“You ok?” his voice was so kind.

“I am amazing,” she kissed him sweetly. “Now I believe you interrupted me while I was exploring you.”

He couldn’t help but chuckle, “Well I didn’t hear you complaining.”

She gave him a dazzling smile, “Not at all.”

So he rolled them back over returning her smile, “Please continue.”

“Gladly,” she moved her hands slowly back down while her lips applied pressure to his neck causing him to groan. Her steady hands started losing their confidence as she got to his waistband.

“Nic, only do what you want to,” his voice was strained but his hands were gently moving over her. 

It was the encouragement she needed. Her hand went further down gently rubbing over his bulge causing him to suck in air. She met his eyes as she applied more pressure. Involuntarily his eyes shut and his head went back slightly releasing a deep groan. 

“Is that a good groan?” Slightly uncertain yet feeling very ridiculous asking such a question. 

“Yes,” he didn’t truly understand how much he wanted her touch until this moment.

“Can we take these off?” 

“That is up to you,” watching her carefully. 

“Then I say let’s take them off.”

“We aim to please,” with a wink as he helped her remove them. 

“I’m glad you have a catchphrase down,” returning his banter. Then she froze. Feeling him through the material was one thing, seeing him was altogether different. He was impressive not that she had a lot of first hand experience but she knew enough. 

He was trying to read her expression, “Nic I-“

“I trust you,” she placed her hand on his hip and looked up at him. She had been lost in her own thoughts, but it quickly occurred to her he was probably concerned about her. 

Releasing a nervous breath, “Good.”

Her hand started moving down where his leg and hip met. The breath he had released was quickly sucked back in. 

She was extremely nervous, “I’m not sure… I was never able…”

“You’re just exploring. No pressure,” he tried to keep his voice even. 

Her fingers were light as they moved down his inner thigh then back up the other side. Finally, she moved to his erection running her fingers up from the base to the tip. He shivered from her light touch. She repeated the motion with a slightly firmer touch causing him to groan. 

“Was that too much?”

He chuckled slightly, “No. He can take a lot of pressure,” he showed her the area he meant, “the head is sensitive like your clit.”

“I’m just worried I am going to do it wrong.”

“There isn’t much you can do wrong. Well don’t bite it,” the look on her face was hilarious. 

“I’m not an idiot,” giving him a stern face that only made him chuckle more. 

“The balls are also sensitive to touch and pressure. Every guy is different in what they like.”

“What do you like?”

“I like slow almost teasing at first then faster and firmer at the end. What you are doing right now is amazing.”

She gripped him harder and started moving her hand up and down. His head fell further back while his breathing became more ragged. The next time her hand moved up she grazed the head causing a shiver to ripple through him. She repeated the motion but changed where the palm of her hand would graze the head. She sensed his breathing change again to a more labored breathing. 

“Conrad, show me what you like.”

He smirked at her. When he moved his hand near hers she moved away, but he quickly grabbed it, “I prefer your hands on me. Here,” he placed her hand back on him with his on top of hers, “like this.”

He guided her to the pressure and speed he preferred. Within a few moments his muscles started to tighten while his groans became more frequent. She was completely fascinated and surprisingly turned on by his response to her.

“Nic I’m going to come if you don’t stop,” his voice came out so quickly she almost couldn’t make it out. 

“Then come for me Conrad,” her words similar to his from the night before. 

“Fuck,” his hips started to thrust. Though it startled her, she kept the rhythm even. 

Her name came out as a moan causing her to instinctively sped up her strokes. Then within a few strokes he came hard. After he came she stopped stoking him. 

“Don’t stop,” his voice begged, “just ease up.” He was desperately trying to fill his lungs again. 

She did as he said, loosening her grip and slowing her strokes. It was completely fascinating to watch him. When she looked up he was still trying to gain control over his breathing while watching her, she smiled softly, “I will be right back.”

He was curious why she had left so quickly but he his mind was still slowly coming back down. Hearing her come back he looked up seeing her with nothing on but her panties caused his mind to go one thought, getting her out of those panties. Noticing his gaze made her blush slightly, oddly she didn’t feel as embarrassed as she did the night before. The distraction of her naked body lasted until she crawled into the bed then he noticed her hands. One hand held a wet washcloth and the other a dry hand towel. 

The feel of the warm washcloth brought his focus to her actions, “Here I can do that.”

“No,” she gently moved his hand away, “I’m not done exploring.”

He chuckled, “Well don’t let me stop you.”

She took time running the warm washcloth over his lower stomach, hips, and groin. Then with great care she moved over him. The entire time she watched his response to her touch. She set the cloth aside and made sure he was dry tossing everything aside once she was finished. However, she kept touching him. Her hand glided lightly over his inner thighs moving back up his body. As crazy as it sounded she had never just touched a man in such a way. Once she made it to his chest she leaned her body into his, slowly kissed his lips, however he had other ideas about the kiss. He rolled them so he was on top 

“God Nic you are amazing,” he mumbled the words against her mouth before capturing her lips again. His hand had moved down her body massaging the flesh on her hips. 

His lips moved to neck, “Nic. I have a question for you?” 

She shivered as his lips sucked on her pulse point, “Yes.”

In a husky low voice he asked, “Did watching me come turn you on?” 

She shivered again but this time from his voice and the question, “Yes.”

He let a slight growl to her response as his fingers had moved to the top of her thigh moving to the top of her panties, “I think it is time for these to come off.”

Slowly he slid them off her. Then started kissing his way up her leg taking his time letting his fingers explore. When he got to the knee he lifted her leg slightly kissing the back of her knee allowing his teeth to graze the sensitive skin. Her breathing sped up and her fist clenched the sheets needing something to hold onto. A dark chuckle escaped him as he continued his way up her inner thigh. 

Suddenly, the realization of where he was heading hit her, “Stop.”

Conrad froze. His face was full of concern as he saw the fear in her eyes, “Did I hurt you?”

“No,” she shook her head, “No, not at all.”

He moved up so they were eye level, “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t know if I’m ready for that…” embarrassment started to spread through her. 

He smiled softly at her, “Ok.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Hey there is no reason for you to be sorry,” he kissed her softly. He danced his fingers around hip inching towards her center, “Can I still touch you?”

“Yes,” her affirmation came out more of a moan than a word. 

The response she gave him was perfect, his lips started kissing down her neck. Those talented fingers of his kept on their steady path until he cupped her. Quickly she pushed into his hand wanting relief. A low growl of appreciation came from him as he easily slid a finger into her. His movements were slow and gentle every other stroke brushing against her clit. 

“Conrad?” Struggling to get his name out. 

He moved from her neck up to her ear, “Yes, Nicolette.”

His gravely voice caused another shiver to shoot through her, “I… I want…”

“Tell me,” his voice maintained its steady calm. 

She didn’t know what she wanted. Her hands moved to his shoulder blade and into his hair. The pressure continued to build as did her frustration, “I don’t know.”

A deep chuckled rumbled through his chest, “How about this?” He inserted another finger in but his movements stayed slow. 

Her body bowed up slightly, “Yes. Faster.”

“Fuck Nic,” he nipped her ear letting his teeth slide off the lobe slowly while his fingers increased their speed. He moved his thumb to her clit making tight circles. She grabbed onto him like her life depended on it. Then her core started to clench around his fingers, “I can’t wait to be inside you baby. To feel grip onto me when you come.”

His voice rumbled through her. Between the added stimulation and his words she felt herself being pushed over the edge. Her grip on him tightened even more as she moaned out his name. She thought she saw stars as she came. When she finally came back down he started to pull away. However she had other ideas quickly moving her hands to the back of his head to keep him in place so she could deepen the kiss. Intertwining her fingers with his hair she tugged slightly, rewarded with low groan. He rested his body into hers enjoying the feel of her skin against his. 

Ever so slightly she pulled back, “I really like this.” Her hands continued to run through his hair. 

The kiss had left his mind foggy, “What?” 

Running her fingers from his hair to his face she lightly glided over his skin causing him to shiver, “This. You right here

That statement made his heart literally skip a beat and a smile that showed in his eyes form, “So do I.”


End file.
